Londoners are sniffing so much coke that it's making eels in the Thames hyperactive
I knew that the cocaine problem in London was bad but I didn’t realise it was so off the chart that even the creatures in the river Thames are high as balls.
A research paper released by King’s College London has found that there’s so much chang usage in London that traces are actually detectable in the River Thames and that it is making the eels in the river hyperactive. It was also noted that cocaine use in London stays consistent throughout the week as compared with other European cities where it peaks at the weekends. I guess those bankers like to get on it on the daily! Here’s exactly what the paper said:
Concentrations of cocaine and benzoylecgonine remained high in wastewater across the week with only a minor increase over the weekend, which is not consistent with other cities.
London is known as one of the highest consumers of cocaine and this suggested everyday usage. Increases in caffeine, cocaine and benzoylecgonine were observed 24 hours after sewer overflow events.
The stuff about the eels came from another study, which showed that eels became hyper when they were placed in solution of water and coke. Err, yeah, if I dunked my head into a bucket of water and coke I’d be fucking hyper too. Sounds to me like the eels are having a bloody good time.
